I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Success! We fucked roommates!
Randomize