I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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