4 words: hood of his car
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
