i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
