have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
