I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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