We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
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