What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
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