what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
