glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
