he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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