He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
