WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
