I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
My feet surprised me
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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