he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
