i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
i think i just lost a toe
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