Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
