Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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