I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Randomize
