WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Found your dick twin last night
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
