Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
