I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
