is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize