I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
The beers last night were like the tears from god
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
