remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
