just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
