guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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