Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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