Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
