I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
