i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
