i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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