so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
