mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
