I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Enjoy the penises
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
