I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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