I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
