i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
