Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
