I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
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