remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize