so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
