I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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