hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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