apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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