All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
