What did we do last night that was yellow?
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize