Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
