please come you make the beer taste better
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Randomize