worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
i came on her dog
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize