Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
