So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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